Friday, April 16, 2010


Ahhhh.....I feel like I can breath again.

And this is a good thing compared to yesterday. Yesterday felt like a nightmare. A horrible, no good, very bad nightmare. The nightmare, unfortunately, isn't over, but I am still hopeful. And not a false sense of "everything is just gonna be great and fine and OK!", but just a peace. A peace that truly surpasses all understanding.

I went back to the fabric store (with coupon in hand!) to get the other fabric I found yesterday. Funny thing, I ended up choosing another one! I liked it better. I even texted the pic to my hubby to see what he thought. I love my iphone. And guess what? It was ON SALE! I didn't even need my coupon. Bonus. didn't rain buckets on me! The sky was dark, but just tiny drops and I did not get drenched walking to my car.

I also love that I feel mostly me again! I know that might sound completely odd to some, but if you know me in real life, you know I am a pretty positive person who is typically pretty happy and excited for others and their good news. Yesterday though? That me was buried under potential grief and pain that was just so dark. I did not like being there in that dark place. It's just not me.

But sometimes I think we all need to just be let to be mad. To be angry and hurt and let it come out. To be able to express it and be OK with not wanting to talk or be reminded of the pain that was bearing down so hard on me yesterday. The fear and pain are still there, but I am able to let it go and let a peace wash over me. I am able to breath today.

I was also able to see cute little girl stuff and not burst into a mess of tears. That is a super improvement over yesterday! I cannot promise I won't tear up on occasion, but ahhh. Breathing feels good.

It feels good to feel more like me again.

I hope no matter what your day is like, that you are able to breath and have a peace too.

Happy Weekend and many Blessings to you!

1 comment:

  1. I'm so glad to read that you are feeling better! Just wanted to let you know that I am praying for you and your little girl and that you can bring her home soon!